Joy in Christ

Dear Brothers and Sisters,

As I was sitting at my computer this Sabbath morning, listening to Lamb of God by Rob Gardner. As I was listening, "I Am the Resurrection" began to play. I can't tell you how much I enjoy this song. I had the opportunity to perform this work in the choir with Rob at Gammage 2 years ago, and it was one of the most fulfilling performing experiences of my life. As I was listening to the song, I was overcome by emotion. The words, taken from the bible, are so powerful, and they spoke to my soul.

And whosoever liveth and believeth in Me shall never die.

I am the Resurrection and the Life

He that believeth in Me, though he were dead

Yet shall he Live.

I am the resurrection

I Am the Resurrection excerpt (my head pops in at :38 on the upper right :D)

How powerful, how comforting is that thought, that through Him, we can have eternal life. It brought tears of joy to my eyes, and made me reflect on the life I lead, and how it's been made whole by following Christ. It made me think of who I was, and who I want to be. It made me think of who I am now, the change of heart I've been granted, and the absolute Joy I feel in Him.

6 months ago, I was slogging through life. I had a job I hated, I was going to school for something I loved, but I doubted I would be successful. I was depressed, I was sad, I was often angry. The smallest things would set me off at a moments notice. I was unsatisfied in my life. Worse yet, so many people around me were so happy. I remember thinking "Why? Why are they happy, when I'm so depressed, unsatisfied. Why do they get to be joyous?" It's because they not only had the Light of Christ in them, a light which we all have to one degree or another, but they followed that Light. They listened, they acted when prompted to do so. As you know, if you've been following this blog, I then sought after, and found this Light.

I cannot adequately describe to you the change in my life it has brought. Once moody and full of rage, I'm joyful, excited about life, and filled with the Love of Christ. I was never a bad person, but I wasn't necessarily a great one. I was more likely to scoff at pleas for assistance than to help. Now, I feel so strongly the love He has for His children that I seek opportunities to help whenever I can.

I recall an instance a few days prior to Christmas where this change was most evident to me. Before I relate this story, I want to mention that this is something I have shared with very few people, because it feels like a humble brag. I promise you I'm not relating this to gain attention, or to receive praise; I'm sharing it because the Spirit is prompting me to do so.

The Monday before Christmas, I went to the store to finish (read: start...)  my Christmas shopping. As I walked from the parking lot to the entrance, I was approached by a woman selling candy canes. She explained to me that it was her daughter's first Christmas, and she was trying to make money to buy her a gift. Usually, I would simply shrug off the sob story, say I had no cash, sorry, and move on. But this day was different. I gave my standard response,m "I have no cash, I'm sorry...", but I was moved to do more. I didn't have cash, but I had a debit card, and more money than I need. So I told her I had no cash, but if she wanted to come with me in the store, I would gladly buy some gifts for her daughter. 

As I write that, I'm reminded of the example of my father, who is one of the most charitable men I know. I can remember various occasions in my life where my father has given money, time, aid to complete strangers. Whether it was offering a ride to the elderly man whose scooter had run out of power in Mesa, miles from his home in Gilbert, or when he felt compelled to offer a homeless man all of the money in his wallet, my father has always been ready and willing to follow the promptings of the Spirit in aiding his fellow man.

That Monday, I followed his example as I took this woman into the store. We picked out a few outfits, grabbed some binkys, and headed to the checkout line. I remember the gratitude she expressed as we walked and chatted in the store. She told me her daughters name was "Serenity... It means peace." I refrained from informing her I was aware, and simply told her it was a lovely name. At the register, I got some cash back and gave it to her, wishing her a Merry Christmas. As we went our separate ways, I was overcome with a wondrous feeling of love, joy, and pride from my Heavenly Father. 

Mosiah 2:17 tells us:

 17 And behold, I tell you these things that ye may learn wisdom;

 that ye may learn that when ye are in the service of your fellow beings

 ye are only in the service of your God.

I felt the truth of this scripture that day. I can tell you with a surety that when we follow those promptings we receive from Him, we are tools in His hands, working His will to help others. I promise you, my dear friends, that when you listen and act upon the promptings you receive, you will be blessed, and you will find joy in the work.

With Love,

Taylor

I Know It's True

Brothers and Sisters

Over this weekend, I was blessed to be able to attend the Arizona Regional YSA (Young Single Adult) conference. Many wonderful speakers delivered messages and lessons, on various topics. One of my favorite speakers was Alex Boyé.

Here's a little clip to acquaint you to the man:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BVzwkn_ilwA

Alex is a singer from Britain, born to Nigerian parents, and a convert to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. He has multiple popular YouTube videos, and is also a member of Mormon Tabernacle Choir (I actually had the chance to speak to him very briefly this morning, and tell him how jealous I was he got to sing and record with Bryn Terfel, one of my voice idols.) During his workshop, there was much shouting, running around, and in general, a lack of traditional "reverence".

And I loved every minute of it.

While some, I'm sure may have been off put by his enthusiasm, I embraced it, I applauded it. It is exactly the method to bring the kind of spirit I feel most deeply. I, much like Alex, can hardly contain my excitement when speaking on a subject that is dear to me, and my spiritual journey. The moment I want to tell you about came when he was talking about the choir preparing for a week and a half long tour. After President Monson gave a farewell devotional to the choir, the manager of the choir asked members what they hoped would happen on the tour. Some gave answers about hitting all the notes, not forgetting music, and other little insecurities. Then the manager rephrased, and asked, what would you have happen. So, if it was up to you, what experiences would you have God grant you in this endeavor?

Alex went home and wrote a list of the things he would have happen. He related that as he went on, they got more and more outlandish and unlikely. After the tour had concluded, and as he returned home, he discovered the list on the floor of his bedroom. As he read over the things he had hoped for, he was astonished to find that each of them had come true. Every single item on his list had happened on that tour. He then urged us to write down the things we would have happen, and take them to the Father. He then got very excited about what he believed the Father's response would be, which included and incredulous "Do you know who I am? I am Alpha and Omega!" I didn't hear much after that, as he ran to one side of the stand, and began jumping up and down, another moment I loved.

As I sat through the next workshop, I reflected on the challenge Brother Boyé had given to us. So, having brought along a notebook to record impressions and thoughts, I wrote a list of what I would have happen during the conference. I haven't looked at it yet, but I remembered there was something inevitably about a girl, something about making connections, and then a sentence saying I will receive a confirmation of the truth of the Book of Mormon. I, much like Alex, then promptly forgot about the list, until I was talking to my father this evening. We read some verses from the Book of Mormon together, and then proceeded to chat about the gospel. As we talked, I remembered the challenge Alex had given us. I related it to my father, and told him a few of the things on it that had come true, and the one that hadn't: eh Book of Mormon. As I spoke to him, I said how strange it was to me, that I knew other things that seemingly would prove it's truth to me. I also pondered on the possibility that the spirit had already whispered it to me, but that I was not listening hard enough. Just because I received the knowledge that God and Jesus Christ live and love me, and that I knew Thomas S. Monson is a prophet of God by a large spiritual revelation didn't mean this revelation would come in the same strength.

As I thought out loud, I said "It's strange, because I know that all good things come from God, and I know there are good and powerful things in this book. So, by process of elimination, I should know it's true." And then I sat in silence for a moment, as I let the spirit come over me. Tears fell from my eyes as I realized..

I know that the Book of Mormon is true. It is the word of God, recorded by His prophets on this continent 2,000 years ago. That it was translated by His prophet Joseph Smith Jr. under the power and direction of the spirit of God.

Brothers and sisters, I know these things to be true. Not because of any logic of my own, but because the spirit whispered it in my ear. Because I felt the burning in my bosom that accompanies the confirming power of the spirit. What a wonderful blessing it is that I have received my answer. What a blessing it is that He has seen fit to place people and opportunities to bring me unto Him, to improve my heart, and change it forever.

I think of one of these people, one of my closest friends as I write this. Elder LeSueur, and area Seventy and newly called President of the Gilbert, Arizona temple, related a story Elder Holland told in a talk, which I will quote here:

"A 14-year-old boy recently said to me a little hesitantly, “Brother Holland, I can’t say yet that I know the Church is true, but I believe it is.” I hugged that boy until his eyes bulged out. I told him with all the fervor of my soul that belief is a precious word, an even more precious act, and he need never apologize for “only believing.” I told him that Christ Himself said, “Be not afraid, only believe,”12 a phrase which, by the way, carried young Gordon B. Hinckley into the mission field.13 I told this boy that belief was always the first step toward conviction and that the definitive articles of our collective faith forcefully reiterate the phrase “We believe.”14 And I told him how very proud I was of him for the honesty of his quest."

After Elder LeSueur finished his remarks, I checked my phone and saw a message from this friend. We had spoken earlier about me finishing the Book of Mormon, and she stated simply: "You are the 14 year old boy, and I want to hung you until your eyes bulge out." And might I tell you, she tried, with little success. :)

I'm so grateful for the gospel in my life. For the wonderful blessings I receive daily because of my faith and obedience. I'm grateful for those people in my life that lift me up, and inspire me to be a better person. I'm thankful for that dear friend, who has done so much for me in my spiritual journey. I'm thankful for MY missionaries; I love them dearly. I'm thankful for Alex Boyé, and his words that so impacted me. I'm thankful to all of you who are reading this. Chances are that you have also impacted my life in a meaningful way. And, might I add my dear brothers and sister, that I love each and every single one of you.

All My Love,

Taylor.

Blessings in the font

My dear brothers and sisters, I have recently had an experience I am compelled to share with you. 

Thursday, I went to the temple to perform baptisms for the dead. 

Side bar: for those of you not of the LDS faith, we believe that baptism by immersion for the remission of sins is vital to enter into God's presence after we pass from this life. As there are many who never get the opportunity to hear the gospel, we do baptisms in their name. These are usually done by family members for their ancestors, and it does not force the deceased to be a Mormon. It gives them a choice to accept the gospel, or not. We don't convert people after death, that's their decision.

Back to my experience; I arrived at the Temple, and was surprised to see many people in the baptistery waiting to go into the font room. Usually, in visits past, I've gotten in and out in twenty minutes. I spent nearly 2 there this trip. But it was my first experience yet.

As I entered into the font room, I saw a young man who had Down Syndrome sitting on the bench, waiting for his name to be called. It struck me as odd, seeing him sitting there. To be able to enter the baptistery, you have to have an interview with your Bishop to determine your worthiness to obtain a recommend. I didn't understand how this brother could be eligible to participate. Then a feeling came over me: He has every right to be here, he hardly has the capacity to sin. I was satisfied with that feeling, and glad to see him there.

As the wait wore on, some people were visibly frustrated, which is a shame in such a sacred place. Something had happened with the time stamps on the paperwork, and they were going in a strange order, causing a big wait for some. This surely only added to the chatter in the font room, as it was unusually noisy that day. However, when Brother Heaton was called, the young man with Down Syndrome, his brother helped him up and to the stairs, and the room became silent. Not a word was spoken as we all watched this young man struggle up the steps, over, and down the steps into the font. The brother baptizing that day was young, no more than 19, and must have been volunteering as he prepared for his mission. It was wonderful to see the gentle way he led Brother Heaton into the correct spot, and showed him how to plug his nose. After he spoke the words, he lovingly lowered Brother Heaton into the water, taking care not to go too quickly and surprise him in any way. 

A great presence of spirit was felt as I watched this touching example of the savior's love for all his children. Here was this imperfect being, rife with physical challenges and differences doing a service for those long dead. Here is this young brother in his social prime volunteering what time his has left at home to perform this sacred ordinance, and being a perfect example of the tender, caring love the Savior would show were he the one baptizing Brother Heaton.

Everyone who was in the room that day witnessed a marvelous thing. I cannot speak for others, but I know I also felt strongly the love my Savior has for me, and the peace that comes with that assurance. I pray, my friends, that we always be mindful of His love for us, and His guiding hand in our lives. I bear you my testimony that the Savior does love you. That He is ever present, guiding you, comforting you, supporting you through all that you do. That that love comes without exceptions, caveats, or limits. That if we turn to Him in faith, He will always answer with love.

I love you, my dear friends,

Taylor

Baptisms for the Dead

As I lay in my bed, planning my day tomorrow, I thought about the Temple; not an unusual pace for my mind to wander. I love going to the Temple and doing baptisms, although this was not always the case, especially my first time.

I remember being so excited to go when I received my limited use recommend, but I didn't actually know how it worked, or what to expect. Luckily, my oldest sister was in town for Thanksgiving, and invited me to go with her to do baptisms. As I entered the Temple for the first time, I was nervous, but excited. My main focus since returning to church has been getting to the Temple, and I was finally ready, at least to enter a portion. But as I progressed, my nervousness began to turn to worry: I had expected so much more. Not of the building or space itself, but of the spirit I would feel inside the house of the Lord.

I shrugged it off, and expected the spirit would be felt more strongly as I entered the font to be baptized. And when that didn't happen, I expected more during the baptisms themselves. And then the confirmations. But in each step of my initial experience, I had trouble recognizing the spirit's still, small voice. I changed back into my street clothes, wondering why I had such trouble. I was asked later how I felt, and the honest answer was confused. I had built up my expectation of the presence of the spirit to being akin to my conversion experience.

But it wasn't. It was the still, small voice often talked about in scriptures and church meetings. I went in with false expectations, and instead of adjusting to the reality, I let worry get in my way of feeling the spirit. As I've returned time and time again, I've begun to get better at recognizing the spirit felt there. For me, it's a sense of peace and calm that was at first small and subdued, but as I've gotten more familiar with it it has grown into a wonderful relief from my day to day burdens. I was counseled by my bishop to strive to go once a week, but I'm honestly not satisfied going only once a week.

I treasure the time I get to spend in the Temple, and I miss that sense of peace throughout my week as the worries and influence of the world affect me. I cannot wait until I am ready to enter the Temple to receive my endowment, surrounded by my family, my missionaries, and closest friends. I'm close, closer than I've ever been, as I'm just one interview with my stake president away from receiving the Melchizedeck priesthood. I'm preparing myself to be more open to the experiences of the Temple in a full session than I was when I did my first baptisms, and I can't wait until I get to spend time in prayer and contemplative thought inside the house of the Lord. It shall surely be a great blessing in my life, yet another that I'm not sure I deserve, but am more than willing to accept from my Lord.

With Love,
Taylor.